Most people long to hear those three little words, the ones that make their heart all aflutter. They're nice. But the words that bring a smile to my face and a tear to my eye at the same time? The oft-forgotten, "Thank you."
     Just when I think proper appreciation has gone the way of the hoop skirt, though, I am pleasantly surprised by a card or phone call of appreciation.
     I was raised on thank you cards. In my mother's book, a gift required a proper thank you be written before we could wear, play with, or spend it. Long before Hallmark and pre-printed cards, a thank you was always written on a blank piece of paper, requiring me to search long and hard for the perfect words to say what I planned to do with a five dollar bill. Or how much I would enjoy the Nancy Drew book. How warm the hand-knit slippers would keep my tootsies. I practiced on a piece of lined paper, then transferred my sentiments, trying not to write up or down hill. A mistake meant starting over on a new piece of paper.
     When I was grown-up enough to have note cards with my initial on the front, Mom took me to Dayton's department store where I paged through huge sample books. So many styles to choose from: block print, cursive, even a fancy curlicue style. Not to mention different colored lettering and bordered edges. Or plain. With no such thing as next-day delivery, an order was placed well in advance of an upcoming birthday or holiday. They were expensive and the fear of making a mistake hung heavy over my head as I tried to make each one just right.
     I tried to pass along the importance of thankfulness to my children, enforcing my mother's "write it before you use it" rule. I relieved some of the pressure by teaching my kids to camouflage a mistake with a drawing of a flower. Or baseball bat. The Polaroid camera we received one Christmas came in handy, too. The quick-as-a-wink photo of a smiling recipient, gift in hand, took up space on the paper and left room for only a well-worded, "Thank you very much. As you can see, I really like the gift you gave me."
     It's easy to extend gratitude nowadays. Inexpensive cards are everywhere. You can even create your own on the computer. And long-distance fees are cheap. A call to Aunt Nan and Uncle Gunnar in La Jolla used to be so expensive. It would have cost a small fortune for all five of us children to say "thank you" for the slippers we received every year. Besides, back then a phone call didn't let you off the hook. It wasn't considered a proper way to express your gratitude
     Thank goodness those old-fashioned etiquette rules have relaxed. Just last week, we received a voice message from our nephew. Fresh out of college, he recently moved to South Carolina to pursue his hockey career. His warm message of thanks, for a birthday card and small gift, was music to my ears. I saved it to play again. And again. Just as I reread thank you cards. Again and again.
     However it's communicated, an expression of appreciation is the best present you can give someone who thought of you. The gift that keeps on giving—a little thanks goes a long way, doesn't it?